Friday, 26 September 2014

Blogtember Challenge Day 26: How I've changed in the past year

Hello honeys,
Well, here we are in the last few days of the Blogtember Challenge. It's been a lot of fun & also the first time since I started this blog in late January of this year, that I've tried to blog every day, which although challenging at times, I've actually really enjoyed.  Thank you so much to the lovely Bailey Jean for organizing a whole month full of writing prompts for us to follow. Do visit her blog, Brave Love, and say hello honeys x

So, todays prompt is:  Sept 26th: How have you changed in the past year?

This is a really interesting prompt.  On first reading, I immediately thought, well I haven't, but of course we all do. In my case, after a little thought, I can think of a couple of areas I've changed, maybe even improved in :)

1. Writing

I'm blogging.  I've always written honeys, but never in the organized, structured way that blogging has encouraged me to.  I'm not just writing, I'm writing regularly.  Blogging has given me something to focus on, to channel my creativity (such as it is lol) into. Best of all, I can use it to document our work in organizing our home.

I was in the break room recently at work, scribbling a few notes into my always present tiny notebook (you never know when a new blog post idea will pop up) when a co-worker asked me what I was doing. I told him I was scribbling some notes for a blog post & he said "are you a blogger? that's so cool!"  You know what honeys? It is cool, it's very cool & I love it x

2.  Organizing

We've always been packrats :) We've collected too much stuff throughout our married life and earlier this year we decided we were fed up with the clutter. So, we're now more focused on creating some kind of order through organizing our home.  It's not an overnight process though unfortunately, but we'll get there eventually & with hubby on board too, at least I know I'll have a giggle along the way :)

3. Coping

Finally, and this is a little personal but I promise honeys, this is not an invitation to a pity party. Those I don't do.  Over the past year or so I've been forced to admit to myself that I'm not as able as I used to be.  I've been battling chronic illness for over 15 years, and that whole time I've tried to keep living as if there's nothing wrong.  I suppose I thought I could fool myself, not let it beat me.

Well, I can't seem to fool myself anymore. I get tired very easily, to the point of being flat out drained after my two shifts at work each week. One of my biggest fears is not being able to work, or of my employers seeing how tired being there makes me and taking my job away. 

So I've had to become very adept at hiding when I'm tired.  At least while I'm there.  Life seems to always be a series of "trade offs."  Which irritates me if I'm honest.  If I want to have a chance of getting through my shifts at work, I now have to completely rest for a day or so before and I'm left so drained for a day (s) after.  I dislike this intensely, that in order to keep working I'm forced to give up other things, for example there are so many things I'd love to be getting on with at home, but simply don't have the energy. 

I need to find a better way to cope, I do feel like the arthritis is starting to get the better of me, and I simply can't allow that.  Sometimes I'm very thankful for my stubborn nature, it's what keeps me going.  Home is my "safe place." when I'm home I can just be me and don't have to worry that anyone sees how tired I am.

Till tomorrow dear ones, sending heaps of hugs your way xx

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